So, in the quest for contentment, I'm turning instead to The School of Life. Opening tomorrow, the self-styled 'chemist for the mind' offers solutions to the craziness of modern existence. From philosophical holidays with Alain de Botton to literary prescriptions from author and in-store 'bibliotherapist', Susan Elderkin, the store's many shelves have something for everyone, whether you want to change the world, or are just worried about death.

Now hopefully the lovely Rajasthani lady from my bank's call centre will understand that I'm undergoing some very serious experience-based enlightenment, and therefore cannot currently be reached for comment on my bank balance.