I'm not American - a point of fact that, no matter the cold shadows cast across us all, continues to bring me some personal warmth. No offence. But really: Gordon Brown may be a touch ineffectual and Cameron undoubtedly a tad gimpish. But Bush? Twice?

And, whilst many of you might assume us too cynical cool to get overtly political, we'd have to be fools to not get excited by the increasingly ubiquitous US election. Which is where my nationality in fact becomes an impediment. For as a Brit (or indeed any breed of non-American - I'm thinking of you, my beloved Canadians), I can't help but feel a little left out of the whole debacle. Sorry, 'race'.

With appropriate prop allocation (rifles for the reds, food stamps for the blues), 24 hour licence, bottomless coffee, full supper and pancake breakfast (to catch the final polls), The East Room is offering a little slice of the election pie to we poor, excluded former overlords (read your history people).

TODAY'S EVENT PICKS

Stranger Than Paradise takes its curious concoctions over to the
dark side. 9pm, Paradise by way of Kensal Green, 19 Kilburn La, W10, £3.

Restless plague victims and a tunnel tour by torchlight. Pants wettingly Eerie. 7pm - midnight, London Tombs, 2-4 Tooley St, SE1. £15.

Room 01 vamps up an incongruous lawyer's office with oddities. 11am - 6pm, Birol & Co Solicitors (69-71 Stoke Newington Road, N16), Free.

Explore the beauty of nature through wildlife photography of the year. 10am
- 4:30pm, Natural History Museum, Cromwell Rd, London, SW7, £7.