This week's ORIGINAL pick: Circus Goes Ab Fab
Proving that they're more than happy to laugh at themselves (which is handy for a night packed with drag glam, door wh*res, and performance art), tonight's Circus goes all 'Ab Fab' for Comic Relief. If you haven't caught the photos of Jodie in full Eddie and Patsy mode, then get on it. And with a film crew down for the night, as the Harshlette puts it herself: "dress the f*ck up - you're going to be on the telly!"

Westbury 2nd Birthday
You might be forgiven for thinking that all the cool, quirky nights are out East. But for the last two years, The Westbury's been pulling in a bunch of surprisingly big names and filling their West London local with smashing soundtracks and a great vibe. Celebrating their big oh-two, they're calling in the New Young Pony Club and Mr Hudson's Tokyoyoyo tonight, and Frankmusik and Rob Da Bank tomorrow night. Stick that in your hipster pipe.

Just The Tonic
'The Tonic', in my household, generally meant a foul tasting German potion with, inexplicably, three nuns on the front of the bottle. It did not taste good. Neither did it make anyone feel closer to God. So to Hell with that. Get down to Nottingham's leading comedy night as it debuts at Leicester Square with Tim Vine, Josie Long, and Gary Delaney in the first of a new weekly late-night residency. Laughter is the best medicine, after all.

Salome
If I could get my father to do an 'enchanting dance' to smite any of my previous love interests, it would look something like the Hokey Kokey crossed with the Macarena. Not terribly frightening. So let's leave the dancing to that seductress of the New Testament, Salome, and the smiting to her step-daddy in this 1923 black and white Oscar Wilde adaptation. Starring lesbian icon Alla Nazimova, this classic flick comes with specially commissioned music by Bishi and an intro from burlesque beauty Immodesty Blaize.

London Word Festival
Mightier than the sword, more powerful than a steaming political engine, able to leap tall metaphors in a single bound. From this Saturday till the 25th, this year's London Word Festival draws on some of our finest wordsmiths, including Iain Sinclair and the deadpan Phil Jupitus, to cover everything from Shakespeare in Shoreditch to Robin Ince's ever-incredible School for Gifted Children, with Bishi as tonight's highlight. She does get about, no?

East 09
On day four of this six day, East end palooza, get ready for Cycle East, wher different modes of transport, including bikes of course, will be used guide you to different music and theatre venues, hang out at the Barbican where its 'Do Something Different Weekend' returns full of weird and wonderful events, and take in the surreal realm of The Paper Cinema.