Anyone nervier since 'Suicide Tuesday' switched slots and meaning can relax this weekend, safe in the knowledge that Red24, a security bureau that shoots straight at the heart of middle class neurosis, is close at hand.

For £80 per year, Red24 will keep you updated on any global security threats - just to remind you of the present dangers, their website displays a rollcall of gems such as, 'tanker escapes pirates off Somalia' and 'Ivorian rebels refuse to disarm', although 'sleazed on in Torremolinos' or 'swindled in Marrakech' might have greater resonance for many UK travellers.

They will also save you if you are taken hostage, captured by terrorists or involved in a siege or natural disaster. 24 hours, anywhere in the world (except for those taking their annual leave in Afghanistan, Haiti or Iraq, who'll still be rescued but have to cough up for expenses - no win/no fee, anyone?).

They also offer specialist advice on issues such as detecting Nigerian banking scams and finding yourself amidst a throng of football hooligans. A situation easily assuaged by reminding your assailants that you'd sooner spend the next five years in purgatory than set foot in a place such as Liverpool.

And who said that no one could ever profit from terror?