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It’s all art, art, art this weekend. Well, death and art really. Damien Hirst would have us believe they’re one and the same over dinner, whilst Free takes on Frieze in a final showdown of anti–commericalism. And if you just want a picture of your dead pet, damnit, we’ve got you covered, alongside Future Disco and a couple of blink–and–you’ll–miss–em shops. Every second is precious people, so let us show you how to make ‘em worth it.

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• FRI Zoo 2009   • SAT Barrio North Birthday Weekender  • SUN Damien Hirst Dinner

TODAY
Clemens en August Open Today

Missed our exclusive preview evening of the new Clemens en August mens and womens A/W collections last night? Well, whilst we cuddle up in our new pea coats and soft, soft cashmere tops, why don’t you pencil a slot into your diary to go and shop the collection for yourself – you’ve only got three days to get your hands on these exclusive pieces before they shoot off, rock tour style to the next destination. Check out UJ’s favourites here.

15th – 17th October, 11am – 8pm.
36 Great Titchfield Street, W1W 8BQ
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FRIDAY
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nightlifeFuture Disco Launch Party
There is something quite frightening about the concept of what will count as ‘Future Disco’. Will Jay Z be re–categorised so we can bop along to 99 problems with the aid of our Zimmerframes, chanting ‘but the bitch ain’t one’ in unison? Not looking quite so apocalyptically far ahead, tonight’s launch celebrates the release of the next edition in the Future Disco series, with a live performance from Faze Action, and sets from Crazy P and Severino. Hard rap, for now, is safe.

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Time:
10pm – 4am
Place:
Queen of Hoxton, 1 Curtain Road, London, EC2A 3JX
Cost:
£6 in advance.
Info:
Future Disco Launch Party
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icon Zoo 2009
Running from Friday until Monday at a new multi–site location, this year’s Zoo Art Fair brings together over 50 contemporary arts organisations and practitioners including Rob Tufnell, Studio Voltaire, FormContent and LUX, through a series of exhibitions, solo shows and stand presentations. You can wander around at will, or check out ‘Film as Subversive Art’ at 1:30pm, or a discussion on ‘Sculpture of the Space Age’ at 5:30pm today. Grab one of the East End Maps for future reference, pointing out all of the contemporary institutions in a 2 mile radius.

Time:
10am – 6pm
Place:
3–10 Shoreditch High Street,E1 6PG
Cost:
£15
Info:
Zoo 2009

COMPETITION
Win tickets to see The Spanish Tragedy

Watched by a ghostly soldier and the mysterious figure of Revenge, the royal leaders of war–torn Spain and Portugal attempt to find peace via a marriage between their families. But the bride to be already has a secret lover, and he’s about to get axed; forging a brutal path of vengeance. UJ have 5 pairs of tickets to give away, to be in with a chance of winning simply tell us: Revenge is a dish best served what?

The Spanish Tragedy
Tickets: 020 7503 1646, Arcola Theatre, E8 2DJ.

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READ
Phaidon Pops Up on Piccadilly

If you’re still mourning the loss of the late–opening Borders on Oxford Street, this latest pop–up courtesy of Phaidon might be some small comfort. Open weekdays until 10pm, it will house the publisher’s entire back catalogue, special collectors editions, Wallpaper box sets and even limited edition prints from the likes of Nan Goldin, Martin Parr and Stephen Shore, for those who like to take their literary idols home with them.

Mon-Sat: 10am–10pm,
Sun: 10am–7pm.
Until Jan 2010.
Phaidon 173 Piccadilly, W1J 9EL.

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SATURDAY
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iconBarrio North 2nd Birthday Weekender
Barrio North is celebrating 2 years on the Essex Road block by pushing out the Barrio boat with a mighty weekend of music, a Tequila Ice Luge at The Beach Bar, free fizz for the early birds, and margarita shots throughout the night as well as a specially crafted birthday cocktail list. The masters of musical ceremonies hosting tonight’s bash include DJ Derek, Trojan Soundsystem Selectors, and Nice Up! Soundsystem. Race you to the caravan – newbies – you’ll catch on quick.

Time:
8pm – 3am
Place:
45 Essex Road, Islington N1 2SF
Cost:
Free
Info:
Barrio North
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UJ Better Place Portraiture
Recently found out that Fluffy wasn’t sent to live on a nice farm back in ’82? Want to ask her how she’s doing, and apologise for thinking a microwave was a faster alternative to the hairdryer? Then this bestial séance at Auto Italia South East might be for you, as the kind folk from Better Place Portraiture make contact with the other side and cast your old friends onto paper as a beyond-the-grave-gift. Bizarre, yes, but probably worth going just to watch people trying to interpret a bunch of scribbles as a heart-to-heart.

Time:
10pm – midnight.
Place:
1 Glengall Road, Peckham, SE15 6NJ
Cost:
Free
Info:
Better Place Portraiture
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SHOP
Rubbish Finger Puppets

We heard rumour that the most fashionable toys this year were coming courtesy of The Daily Rubbish – finger puppets in the form of our favourite designers and editors – and they’ve finally landed! In Liberty, of course, where you can choose from boxsets of your favourite fashion city, Milan, London, New York or Paris. Loving how Giorgio and Donatella have been knitted out of orange wool, and the Victor & Rolf body comes with two heads.

£65 BUY HERE

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SUNDAY
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UJDamien Hirst Dinner
Fancy taking in Damien Hirst’s new deathly exhibit, but prefer to be alone whilst you’re surrounded by skulls? To accommodate your rather morbid whims, dear reader, The Wallace Restaurant is offering a three course set meal (or a more lavish feasting menu) which comes with a private view of the exhibition, so you can drink, dine and have death for dessert. We’re rather hoping our waiter for the evening will be the Grim Reaper himself.

Time:
5:15pm – 9:30pm
Place:
The Wallace Collection, W1U 3BN
Cost:
£45/ £55.
Info:
Damien Hirst Dinner
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UJFree Art Fair – The Giveaway
Jasper Joffe’s Free Art Fair has been the lovingly attended antithesis to Frieze’s commercial parkland hoopla for the past three years. To mark this, its final episode, the event is bigger and better with over 50 participating artists being asked to incorporate the idea of ‘free’ into their works. Today all of the pieces, from the likes of Harry Pye, Robin Mason, Jasper Joffe, Bob and Roberta Smith, will be given away - not to the highest bidder, but to people drawn entirely at random. If you fancy your chances, register by 2pm today and keep your fingers crossed.

Time:
11am – 2pm, giveaway 4-5pm.
Place:
Barbican Centre, Silk Street EC2Y 8DS
Cost:
Free
Info:
Free Art Fair

DESIGN
CultureLabel - stops your toes turning blue

If you’ve been round Frieze till your toes turned blue and you still haven’t found anything you can afford then panic no more. Culturelabel.com has handpicked from partner Studio Voltaire (who are guest curators at this year’s Zoo, no less) a selection of great artist designed prints atb affordable prices.

Studio Voltaire from CultureLabel.com

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LAST MINUTE
The Shoreditch Ball

If you’re sitting there thinking, heck – I’d like to attend a glittering ball, eat some canapés, drink some champagne, listen to some cracking music and maybe throw some money charity’s way – then fortuitously, we have just such an event. The inaugural Shoreditch Ball will feature special guests The Blockheads and Mano De Dios, a Sotheby’s art auction with pieces by Jack and Dinos Chapman and Tracy Emin, and of course, that warm fuzzy feeling that comes from doing good. Or too much free fizz.

The Shoreditch Ball, Tickets £99
8pm – 1:30am at Shoreditch Town Hall
Email: giovanna@shoreditchball.com

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Weekend guide by MaM
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