Another day. Another members bar.

Even we, at Urban Junkies - many of us Olympic-level drinkers - have trouble keeping up with all the openings and closings of London's exclusive establishments. (Not as much trouble as to try to work out which suit bought which drink, but whatever...)

But it's addictive, isn't it? Trying to find that perfect bolthole in London. That place that isn't filled with, well, undesirables.

The Cuckoo Club, situated in the former Stork Rooms, on Swallow Street has already secured itself an impressive list of members including Jemma Kidd, Alice Temperley, Freddie Windsor and Jefferson Hack - all of whom feature on the vetting team to decide whether or not Little Old You is worthy of entry into the new restaurant/club.

The atmosphere is dubbed rock-chic, which seems to be alarmingly 2001, but then again, what do I know about music? (Give no head; no backstage passes?) We'll be going for the food - which sound reassuringly expensive - and the cocktails, many of which were specially created for Cuckoo Club by alcohol-artist Jussi Willehard Kalmi formerly of 50 St James.

City boys, hurry up and make your way to W1. The gays and lesser royals are seriously stingy with the champagne...